Dusting Off Past Work
My Documents/Writing folder is reasonably well organised: Individual folders for each of the five manuscripts that could be considered active (five? wtf?), a folder for documents from my publisher, one for friends’ work that I’ve been asked to edit or review, another called ‘Mine-Misc’ for bits of projects that I’d like to work on, idea notes, or pages that I’ve started but didn’t really go anywhere, and one called ‘Old Stuff’. That last one is the scary one. Some of the pieces within were previously published or used on my blog, but some were things that just never went anywhere, deemed unworkable or unpublishable. Such was the fate of Deceivers, a fantasy novel of epic proportions. (Both in the scale of the story and the wordcount. Yikes.) I’ve changed the title about three times, and will probably change it again.
I dusted it off and loaded it up the other day, and found myself both delighted and appalled, two things I didn’t think one could feel simultaneously. The story and characters are good. (That’s the delighted part.) But holy crap the writing was bad. I sat there, looking over the first chapter, wondering why any agents had ever requested to see more, and I did get requests on it. Were they blind? Desperate? Being uncharacteristically kind?
I don’t think I’ve looked at this file in three years. I started it many many years ago, and have rewritten it about four times, through three marriages and six houses on two continents. I broke my teeth on this book, so I could never bring myself to delete it, even though it was the cause of the biggest emotional rollercoaster of my adult life. I wrote that book over and over, working, crafting, learning, until finally I decided it was unpublishable. But now I see plainly the problems with wordiness, overwriting, confused language or ambiguousness. I took the first paragraph and in five minutes fixed what ten years of work couldn’t do.
So what the hell has happened to me, and when did it happen? I was chatting with Kate last night, hoping maybe she could explain the difference between now and then. I don’t remember learning how to clean up language or spot awful writing, much less learning how to stop doing it. It wasn’t really until yesterday that I realised how bad some of my old works were. I got so much praise from friends and critique partners back then. Were they being kind, or did they just not see the problems either?
I have to admit I’m tempted. That book was my first love. Should I give in to the temptation to resurrect it? I know I could do it, because I see what caused its long and horrible death. Or should I chalk this up to a now-I-know-better moment, love it for what it was, but leave it with the other ‘Old Stuff’ and force my eyes forward.
It’s tempting. Oh, so tempting.
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The good thing about our first works, is we see how far we’ve come. I’d love to tackle my first manuscript. I really like the story and think it has market appeal. But it’s all tell and now show.
If there’s a story buried in the writing, consider doing it.
Go on – go over to the Dark Side and GIVE IN to Temptation.
You wouldn’t have looked at it if it weren’t calling – nay! CRYING out for you to give it a SECOND CHANCE!!!
Good luck!!!
Take care
x
My writing has changed so much in just a few years. I cringe when I go back and read what I wrote when I first started!
Well, CassaStar was my first story, although the book will bear next to no resemblance to my original conception. So don’t give up on your first love.
[ Follow me on Twitter: alexjcavanaugh ]
Oh, such a tough choice! I have a folder like that too and it’s so fun to go through all that old work and see what’s in there. I think a lot of times resurrecting a whole story/book is tough, but I think there’s always always something in there worth moving forward with. Good luck.
[ Follow me on Twitter: MeganSwicegood ]
If the character and the story are good, why not? It sounds like you love the story. Maybe you should try rewriting it without looking at the original and see how that works.
[ Follow me on Twitter: jemifraser ]
It depends on how busy you are, but if and when you have time I think you should. I say never delete anything, no matter how bad it is. There are always ideas that can be mined, or if nothing else, great examples of bad writing to learn from. Once it’s deleted, it’s gone baby gone.
My own file system is a royal mess. I can’t find some things I know I’ve written, and it bugs the heck out of me. Computer upgrades are hell.
~jon
[ Follow me on Twitter: jmstro ]
I pulled out an old piece of writing this week. Short story and I was shocked. Having been trying to revamp it all week. Which tells me I have learned a lot since I wrote this piece, but I am not there yet.
You’ll never know what could come of it if you don’t give it a try.
I’m going to argue for the other side and say you should keep it as a reminder of the love, time and effort you put into it and then move on. Lots of people never publish their first few books with good reason. Saying that, I find rereading anything old is akin to torture. I get an overwhelming urge to throw it across the room or burn it on the fireplace Gogol style.
Regardless, people probably saw merit in your manuscript and were not being kind only to spare your feelings. Especially industry folk, who would rather chew off their own toes than tell you something’s good when it isn’t.
Your novel is probably in better shape than you think, but that doesn’t mean it will work this time – you might even encounter the same old problems (despite the better writing). Whatever you decide, it will help remind you that you didn’t just arrive here accidently. You’ve paid your dues, and you have the scars to prove it.
There is also third option of putting it in drawer until after you publish a few more things and then rework it.